Ideas can come from anywhere.
It might not be from you.
Some of the best ideas come from people not entrenched in our day-to-day lives.
It’s the people on the edges who tend to come up with unique and creative ideas that help us turn a corner.
There will be times of unease in any relationship where the raging rapids of emotions are flowing heavy and retreating seems like the only viable option.
But there is another.
You build a bridge over it.
Just because we liked them doesn’t mean we should be with them.
There are many factors that have to line up for it to even get started, and then you have to have consistent growth as the days pass by.
It can become relatively easy to read people if we focus on the decisions they make.
The words can throw us off course but it’s their actions that paint the brightest picture.
Eye-opening data can come from that observation if we are willing to accept what it’s telling us.
Let them laugh.
Let them judge.
Let them gossip.
Let them dismiss.
Heartbreak is one of the worst human feelings we can experience.
It ravages us deep down at our core.
But we should be grateful we get to experience it at all. It means we had the highest of highs, with wonderful moments and pleasant memories.
Hang around people that want to play the game of life in “expert mode.”
They are a great teammate to support your efforts.
They love solving obstacles so they can grow wiser.
They understand that failure is a part of the process.
I’ve been podcasting for 5 1/2 years with most of the interviews taking place virtually.
It has its benefits with the flexibility of scheduling around a full-time job but it can lose the connection of being in the presence of someone and feeling that energy.
So, when I get to meet my guests in person, either during the interview or after, it hits home for me.
Don’t compare or compete, collaborate.
Comparison can make us depressed and feel like we’re not doing enough.
Competing can move us off course because we might have a different outcome goal than someone else.
But collaboration is where growth happens.
It’s about connection.
Human beings connecting with other human beings.
I don’t care what type of relationship it is.
The most cherished sports dynasties in the world are coveted because of a long run of winning outwardly.
But it’s the things that nobody talks about that makes them a dynasty.
It’s hard not to be a “prisoner of the moment.”
We uncover neat experiences.
We discover new opportunities
We are wowed by new people.
Unfortunately, one of the more difficult things in life is to accept that these don’t always last.
This cliche needs to be put to bed.
Sure, people with different personality traits, musical tastes, hobbies, and social skills get together all the time. Many of them become happy in the long term.
When we look from the outside and think they are “opposite” it takes our focus off what matters most.
Goodbye doesn’t always mean forever.
It might be for a season or two.
For the cosmos to align again.
To see if it’s truly meant to be.
Things that are free are mostly taken for granted.
Our mind.
Our body.
Our relationships.
We only realize how important they are when they get taken from us.
Until we can no longer have them in the same capacity as before.
Sometimes the most priceless things in the world don’t cost a thing.
The best relationships in life have one clear thing in common.
There is a complimentary toolset that each person brings on the journey.
No one person is better than the other. Sometimes the tools one person has will be used and other times it’ll be the opposite. Oftentimes, the tools will work together to create something useful and generous.
How incredible is life?
In an instant, without any warning, our life can be altered in the most magical way by the most magical people.
People that, just a few seconds ago, didn’t exist to us. We had no idea who they were.
Surround ourselves with people who when we look in their eyes there is a fire that projects back into our soul.
It may sound hokey but we’ve all experienced it at some point in our lives. There is this energy, this aura, this force that surrounds them. We know it’s different than most people we encounter.
The cataclysmic discovery that can change the course of our life is the realization that almost nobody is thinking about us almost all of the time.
At first, it appears devastating until we realize that this is the same for everyone.
When this “aha” moment appears it begins to free us of the shackles that hold us into place and don’t allow us to start.
Disagreeing is not toxic in a relationship.
Being unwilling to listen to a different perspective is.
If we are scared to have a direct conversation with someone over something that we care about or that is bothering us then we should question the strength of our relationship with them.
We get so caught up with big and bold. Be seen, be heard, be cheered.
But it’s actually the moments that most people don’t witness that are the most important to a happy life.
It’s reading a book to your kids and giving them a hug and kiss goodnight.
We never know when new people are going to enter our world. Think of close friends, a mentor, maybe a spouse or significant other.
There was one day we never knew who they were. We didn’t know we needed them. Until we felt that spark of energy.
We’ve all felt it. We’ve all had it. We all want to feel it again.
Change is constant and change will happen.
We are either a part of that change or we are fighting against it.
Our body changes as we age but if we’ve been focusing on fitness and healthy eating, that change is quite delayed. If we haven’t, we start to feel those effects compound over time. Building healthy habits early on and sticking with them help form a foundation for us to live each day by.
As we think back about our best memories, they are always simple and we are normally surrounded by others.
I think about the moment I found out we were having a baby.
I think about the first moment I held him.
I think about playing golf with my son.
I think about falling in love.
Let’s not kid ourselves, people tell us exactly how they feel, one way or another, whether that’s a response by phone, a text message, body language, responsiveness, or a lack of communication.
Whether good or bad, people are telling us and we just have to be paying attention to the signal and block out the noise.
I tell my son to “Make someone smile today” when I drop him off at school.
The easiest way to enact a positive change in our life is to positively change someone else’s life.
A smile can have ripple effects far greater than we know.
Who are you going to make smile today?
Rejection hurts because we believe everyone should like us, want to be with us, or want to do business with us.
It doesn’t work that way. Rejection teaches us more about the people who are right for us than the people who are not.
It’s been 3 years since my wife and I got divorced. Funny how that much time has passed. Funny to think what we could’ve changed to make it work.
A lot of things for sure.
But, then again, it was probably the right decision. We were both unhappy.
Getting a surprise text from an old friend or a random gift sent to us makes us feel so good. We get a smile on our faces and we’re grateful that there are people out there thinking about us.
Who could we spin that idea around on today? Who haven’t we conversed within many months or years that we could send a text or message to saying we are thinking about them?
The people we connect with tell a lot about who we are as a person.
Do they make us laugh, think, or play? What do we tolerate? What concessions do we make despite red flags? Where do we draw our lines?
“We are the average of the five people that we spend the most time with”, as the saying goes.
Eyewitness accounts and memory recognition can be some of the foggiest and unreliable pieces of information when time elapses.
When in doubt, get everything on “paper” and have it confirmed.
EPISODE 186
High-Performance Coach | Author, Name That Mouse: Because the Elephant Isn’t The Only Animal In The Room
There are definitely times we need to be alone. Sometimes we need a breather from everyone else. Disconnecting from the world can be healthy for our mental state.
We hear slogans like “Taste the feeling”, “That’s what I like”, “They’re Gr-r-reat” and hundreds of other slogans in marketing ads across the world.
We bring people into our lives for various reasons. As time passes and growth happens there may be people that end up not being appropriate to share our time with anymore.
We think about depreciation as assets like our cars losing value over time but we might consider this with our relationships as well so they don’t do the same.
This month I would be celebrating my 10 year wedding anniversary.
But we didn’t make it much past year 7.
In a strange way, I still celebrate on that day and spend time thinking about the past.