We’ve all had more “failed” relationships than we can count.
Friendships are no longer intact.
Business partnerships split.
Divorce and Break-ups.
It’s happened throughout our lives and emotionally those take a toll on us.
But, there is a silver lining to all of it.
If we are willing we can gain a positive perspective and take away gifts.
Although those relationships have soured, the gifts that have come out of them might make a world of difference in our future.
We are more thoughtful about what we want and don’t settle for mediocrity any longer.
We are more decisive about our actions and don’t waiver.
We are more grateful for the opportunities that arose out of the ashes.
I’ve had many gifts that have come out of relationships that haven’t worked out.
We become disappointed when others are not as excited about our accomplishments as we are. We didn’t get enough likes or shares or engagement. We can let it get to our heads and change our mood, even in the midst of the accomplishment that might have been really important for us.
But, we have to remember, when others accomplish something, how often are we to compliment them, hit the simple “like” button as we are scrolling, leave a comment, etc? If we aren’t doing this often then why should we expect others to?
Getting really good at not needing the outside praise can do wonders for our psyche and it starts from a place of perspective.
The perspective we should have is that most of us are worrying about ourselves and the small bubble we live in. Other people are not intentionally avoiding us or our achievement. They just don’t necessarily care because it doesn’t benefit them directly or they are head down working on the things that are leading them toward a better life.
That’s okay. We have to be okay with this.
As long as we are living our ethos, our purpose, and putting good energy out into the world then that is all that should matter.
Because, remember, as we are focusing on that, we may be missing the opportunity to acknowledge someone else’s accomplishment. And that’s okay. We can’t be everywhere. Nor should we expect that from anyone else.
If we got away from the noise and pressure of pleasing others we might find clarity in our thoughts.
As much as we might have a hard time trusting them, our thoughts paint a colorful picture of the world we’d like to live in and the person we’d like to be.
Our thoughts are truthseekers. Our thoughts are vivid and exploratory. Our thoughts hold a key that could unlock our dreams.
Which is why we often avoid them. We’re scared of what our thoughts might tell us. We fear the truth. We fear it telling us something far different than what the world wants us to be.
So we seek chaos and noise and warm bodies. We seek distractions. We thrive on being busy.
But when we get those moments of calm where our thoughts can become vibrant, those moments can wake us up and make us whole again, even if only for a few precious minutes.
Instead of running away, we should be seeking, chasing, and trying to plan more of those moments as they might end up giving us the fuel we need to power us to the next level of our growth.
We just have to bridge the gap between what the world wants us to be and what we truly want to be. That bridge is built on acceptance. We must accept the truth within and respect it for what it is. That is the only way we can start to become comfortable with our path forward.
Walking toward the truth ends up being the most honest thing we can do for ourselves and for our lives.
There are a few definitions of the word but I’d lean toward what the masses would articulate as weird and that is by using another word; Different.
That’s what kids mean when they say something is weird. They mean they don’t understand it, it’s new, it’s unlike anything they’ve seen before. It’s different.
Kids generally tell it like it is. They speak their mind as the stream of consciousness flows. And that should inform us of something.
Weird isn’t bad, it’s just different.
We should consider our “weirdness” a gift we can share with the world and look upon it as a benefit.
Have you ever watched a Sci-Fi Movie or Show where everyone dresses the exact same and basically looks the same? Can we even imagine how boring and limiting that must be? We can’t express ourselves, we can’t find people who share our values or our interests, we can’t find our tribe to belong to. To me, that seems like a sad way to go about living.
When we truly discover ourselves, find self-love, and detach away from the outside noise we can start to find where we belong. We can do the things that make us feel good, bring us joy, and allow us to express ourselves. We can find belonging with people who accept us for who we are and what we bring to the table. It doesn’t mean someone has to always agree with us or won’t challenge us but it’s someone who is there to be supportive and generous with their time and effort in the relationship.
We should consider changing our perspective on what weird is and why it’s important. The problem we see with the world is that we want everyone to have our weirdness and think like us and if they don’t it must mean there is something wrong with them.
Deep down we really know that’s not true.
Deep down we know it’s an “us” issue and not a “them”.
Deep down we still have work to do.
They may not be the people you connect with or form a strong bond with but it doesn’t mean they shouldn’t have their own voice. Acceptance of others and gaining perspective on how others may think, feel, and act as the first big step to growth and being comfortable with who you are and knowing it’s okay if others aren’t exactly the same way.
I’m weird and I think being your own kind of weird is really cool.
Sometimes saying “I don’t know” is the first step to a new discovery. The admittance that we are naked with our knowledge, vulnerable with our thoughts, and open to what will come next might be all we need to break out into a brave new direction.
That single truth of acceptance is the catalyst for change.